What is Your Definition of Success?
When it comes to personal and professional growth, defining success is a deeply personal process. Yet, too often we find ourselves measuring our achievements against others. This comparison game can be detrimental to our personal and professional growth. As a coach, I’ve seen firsthand how crucial it is for individuals to define success on their own terms. Let’s explore why this matters and how you can start redefining success for yourself.
The Danger of Comparison
I recently met with a client to discuss her progress on her goals. When I asked her to rate her progress on a scale of 1 to 10, she confidently stated she was at an 8. I was thrilled for her! But what happened next caught me off guard. She asked if that was okay.
This moment highlighted a common issue many face: we often seek validation for our own measures of success. We compare our journey to others, forgetting that each path is unique. Your 8 might be someone else’s 10, or vice versa. The key is to recognize that your scale is the only one that truly matters.
Defining Success on Your Terms
Over the past ten years, I’ve learned that defining success is not about meeting external expectations—it’s about understanding and embracing your own journey. There have been times when my own “measuring stick” didn’t meet my expectations, and I had to adjust. That’s part of growth.
I was reminded of this during a conversation with a colleague. When I mentioned that starting something later in life might not be ideal, she simply asked, “Who says?” That question hit me hard: Who says what’s too late or too early? The truth is, we often let societal norms or others’ opinions shape our definition of success. But the only opinion that truly matters is yours.
Breaking Free from the Comparison Trap
- We are all unique individuals: Your strengths, experiences, and goals are different from anyone else’s.
- Comparison breeds self-doubt: Constantly looking at others’ achievements can make you feel inadequate.
- Success is personal: What matters most is aligning your achievements with your own values and aspirations.
Steps to Start Defining Success
So, how can you start defining success on your own terms? Here are a few steps to consider:
- Reflect on your values: Take time to think about what truly matters to you. Is it career growth? Personal fulfillment? Strong relationships?
- Set meaningful goals: Define goals that align with your values and aspirations—not someone else’s.
- Create your own scale: Decide how you’ll measure progress toward your goals based on what feels right for you.
- Celebrate small wins: Every step forward is worth celebrating, no matter how small it might seem.
- Reevaluate regularly: As you grow and change, your definition of success might evolve—and that’s okay.
Remember, defining success isn’t about achieving perfection or meeting external benchmarks. It’s about creating a life that feels meaningful and fulfilling to you.
Embracing Your Unique Journey
What dream or goal have you been hesitant to pursue because you’re worried it doesn’t measure up? Now is the time to say, “I can do this step by step!” By focusing on defining success for yourself, you can break free from the comparison game and embrace where you are right now.
Your journey is uniquely yours, and that’s what makes it powerful. Whether you’re working on personal growth or professional development, remember that the most important measure of progress is the one you set for yourself.
Redefining Success Together
Defining success doesn’t have to be a solo endeavor. Sometimes, having someone guide and support you can make all the difference. If you’re ready to explore what success means for you—whether in your career, relationships, or personal life—consider reaching out for support.
Let’s have a conversation about your goals and dreams. Together, we can uncover what success looks like for you and create a roadmap to help you achieve it step by step.
Don’t let comparison hold you back any longer. Embrace your unique journey, celebrate your progress, and start defining success on your own terms. You have the power to create a life that feels truly successful—because it’s defined by you.
I’m Amanda Warlick, and I founded Resilient Life Mentoring because I believe everyone deserves to navigate life’s challenges with clarity and resilience, whether it’s a career shift, a high-conflict divorce, or another significant life change.
